Top Notch

La cât jeg și câtă mizerie e la televizor, am găsit, după ore întregi de răscolit, o emisiune genială care aduce o rază de soare în viața mea dezolantă. Desigur, este Top Gear, show-ul care m-a făcut să ador umorul britanic.

* Sure it’s quiet, for a diesel. But that’s like being well-behaved for a murderer.
* We get complaints that we don’t feature enough affordable cars. So we’ll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari.
* Speed has never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary… that’s what gets you.
* Ok, the wheel is no longer wobbling,got a new engine,got a new gearbox,and it feels… exactly the same.
* Men with supercars have small penises and crap themselves when they go round corners
* 0-60 takes 5 and a half seconds…and about 17 gallons of fuel
* The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite.
* It has a top speed of 88 but takes so long to reach it that no one has ever lived long enough to verify.
* That’s not a racecar. That’s pornography!

Și cea mai tare:

*When they debate as to what the sound of the SLR engine was akin to, the British engineers from McLaren said it sounded like a Spitfire. But the German engineers from Mercedes said „Nein! Nein! Sounds like a Messerschmitt!” They were both wrong. It sounds like the God of Thunder, gargling with nails.


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